Let's Do This

Well social pressure dictates all of my actions most of the time, so now I thought for once I'll just "Laugh at the Rules" as they say and forget about the mountains of homework I have lying next to me (READ: 2 sleeping asians, 1 potted plant, and 1 loose-leaf sheet o'paper). So naturally, I created a blog. I rationalized this once my mom told me that my dad has been feverishly blogging away these past few days. If a 55 year old man, finger-pecking the keyboard can do this, then I'll be damned if I can't. Well, what to say. You know these bloggers make it look so much easier. But who cares what I say, really. After all, I'm the only one reading this. I am the only one who cares enough about me. I'll just write what I want. Let's just hope to God (capital G) that I never run for public office anytime soon.

Let the Floodgates OPEN.

My freshman year of college is rapidly approaching a close and I can't even explain what this means to me. How it makes me feel. I just don't know. People say you slowly become more certain of the future once you begin college. Actually, no, I don't know if I've ever heard that. But I can make up whatever sayings I want. This is my blog. This is me. Now I sound pretentious. Which, for those who know me, I am not. In fact my last public vow (Other than "I'm going to shower tonight") was to talk more about myself. Something that I hate doing. I hate when people focus all their attention on me. Real of fake. I hate opening myself up to other people. Strangers. I want to, but I can't. It's like to me my brain has been all mine, my thoughts have been all mine. I haven't shared them with anyone, and if I let an inkling of my thoughts/feelings slip out I immediately wish them back. To me nothing I think is actually real. It's all just inside. It's something that I can't even fathom someone listening to. Thinking about. Caring about. Feeling about. Their mine. No one gets it. This is my problem, I know.

ufwhowahfuhafusp I'm still learning. That's the one thing I'm certain about. I am still learning.

Someone get me some agua fria, this here post got too serious too quickly.